Working in retail

About a year ago, I had a jolly good idea. I had just finished secondary school and I was facing what felt like an endless summer. I welcomed the sudden freedom after the exams with open arms. But after a week or so the novelty wore off and I felt like I had too much time at hand. I got bored. What should I do with my free time? After many days of pondering, I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, I should get a job! A new question emerged: What kind of job should I get? I decided to go for something cliché and I applied for a job in retail. A few days later I was invited for an interview and it was announced that I got the job. Hooray! That day marked the start of a most interesting journey.

Working in retail, one has to deal with customers. A lot of customers. Over the course of a year I have probably met thousands of people, some were nice, some were annoying (sometimes I have to remind myself to stay calm) and some were... weird. It would be fun to look back on these experiences when I'm older. So here are some of my experiences with customers at my job.

1. One day a Japanese man walks in and approaches me. "Excuse me, miss, do you sell food-oh?" What the hell... Did he just ask me if we sell voodoo? What? Why? And then I suddenly thought of the anime Death Note. I thought of Yagami Light. I remembered that, when others call him, it often sounds like "Light-oh-kun". Hang on... Light-oh minus the oh equals Light. Voodoh minus oh equals... Oh, I get it. "Yes sir, the restaurant is that way."

2. A very excited boy comes in and in his hand he is holding a small package with something green in it. I happened to be near him at that moment, so he walked over and practically pressed the package against my face. "Look what I bought, Look!" And then he was dragged away by his friend. What was that guy trying to show me? That package contained something that looked like green powder or leaves or something. And then it dawned on me. Oh God, that guy was showing me weed! 

3. A woman came to return a purchase. "Hi! I would like to return this." *shows her purchase* "Of course, ma'am. Please go to the customer service department (which is like ten steps away from my cash register) to return your purchase." That was when her attitude changed. "WHY CAN'T I JUST RETURN IT HERE?" "That is not possible. This is the company's policy." "THIS IS BAD SERVICE!" And then she walked away. Well, okay...

4. A woman comes to pay for her purchases and starts talking to me in Spanish. "I'm sorry, I can't understand you. Do you speak English?" "NO, NO ENGLISH, SPANISH!" She demands that we continue the conversation in Spanish. "But ma'am, I can't understand you." Spanish is a beautiful language and I wish I could speak it, but I can't. After a while she gets annoyed. This has actually happened quite a few times. I've also been addressed in Russian. I wonder how some tourists navigate the streets if they don't speak either the language of the country they're visiting or English. 

5. A grown man comes to me and asks if he can try on girls' underwear. Need I say more?

Working in retail is interesting, indeed.

Yours faithfully,

Morgana